They always say time changes things, but you actually have to change them yourself.
Life transitions are rarely ever smooth. That is probably because no matter how much you claim to love change, truthfully it sucks. It is just human nature to resist it. While we may think we are seeking to alter our life with new haircuts, new lovers, new apartments, and new ideas, we are not really changing anything. By distracting ourselves with these small modifications, we are avoiding what really needs to be revised.
Big changes scare us.
And that is ok.
Learning how to embrace the fear and to smooth the chafing resistance to the transformations in your life is what makes you a stronger person. Of course altering your life is hard; it’s new. New things are painful. Think new tattoos, birth, a bud bursting into blossom. These things do not happen slowly so there is no time to adjust. Instead, they appear on the scene from stage left and then take time to become beautiful. The instant of their arrival is, however, always unsettling.
As much as we wish it were otherwise, change, my friends, is a necessary force of life. Why? Because when we combat and struggle against something, we progress as humans. It’s true; just listen to C.S. Lewis, who once again masterfully encapsulated one of life’s profound truth’s into an eloquent verse saying,
It may be hard for an egg to turn into a bird: it would be a jolly sight harder for it to learn to fly while remaining an egg. We are like eggs at present. And you cannot go on indefinitely being just an ordinary, decent egg. We must be hatched or go bad.
I am as guilty as anyone to resisting change. In fact, I dream of it and I hope for it, but when it comes I dig my heels into the ground, stubborn as a donkey, and hope that if I pull away long enough I can stay where I am. But try as I might to fight it, inevitably change always wins.
And that too is ok.
Life happens because of decisions. I would rather follow my whims, quitting jobs, floating around the world, and coming home because someone tugged my heartstrings than be still. Stillness is serenity, but what is serenity at the cost of knowledge? I do not want the emptiness as an excuse for peace. I am already at peace with my world. Instead, I would rather fill my head with ideas and memories and sort out the chaos at a later date than cultivate a tepid existence. Wouldn’t you?
I’m curious, what ways has great change in your live unexpectedly altered you for the better? Tell me your story below, I’d love to hear!